I'm not just somebody that you used to know
by Arianna4President
Summary: What really happened in 5x24 and after that? Is it all what it looks like? - Fic dedicated to all the Dair fans who didn't lose hope, and also to the ones who did.
1. Prologue

**Dear Dair fandom,  
**

**I haven't lost hope on Dair, even after 5x24. The episode made so little sense that there _must_ be something underneath. Why would the writers throw away those beautiful (and healthy) moments to get back to an abusive relationship?  
**

**So I decided to write this fic to explain what really happened in 5x24 and after. I assumed I can't be worse than GG writers XD  
**

**I'd really appreciate your reviews (:  
**

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**SEPTEMBER 2012.**

_But you didn't have to cut me off_

_Make it like it never happened_

_And that we were nothing_

_I don't even need your love_

_But you treat me like a stranger_

_And that feels so rough_

" Could you please turn off the radio? " asked Dan kindly to the taxi driver. The man just grunted, but pressed a button and the car immediately fell silent. Dan could still hear the words ringing in his head like church bells, though.

He looked out of the car's window, gazing at New York's skyscrapers he hadn't seen in so long. He couldn't say he had missed the city – too many people, too many memories.

But the summer was over, and he had had to get back. For the one-hundredth time, he couldn't help but think about how differently things would have gone if she had gone to Italy with him, if she had _chosen_ him. She would be sitting next to him, now, with a summer dress and her hair a bit unkempt for the trip, her eyes excited to be back to the city she loved so much. She would be talking about all the things to do that fall, all the people to meet, all the new exhibits to visit and he would just listen to her, mildly amused by her excitement.

But she wasn't there.

Dan sighed and tried to forget, but it was even harder now that it was back, when every place reminded him of her. When he had landed at JFK he had to close his eyes for a moment and take a deep breath not to be overwhelmed by all the memories of him saving her from her wedding, at all the people's stares, at _her_ in that New York hoodie, at _her_ sleeping on his arm in one of those plastic chairs, at _her_ apologies, at _her_ hug…

Forgetting her – or at least trying – had been easier in Rome, miles and miles from her. He had to admit he had had fun; the city was beautiful, the weather was fantastic, the food great. He had met a lot of new writers, some just as unknown as he was, other more famous, but all friendly and intelligent. He had discussed art, movies (and he often had to stop himself from mentioning her and her witty opinions on the topic), he had written and travelled through the whole region.

He had also meet a girl. Her name was Francesca, she was a 20 years old read-head studying medicine at the University. She was carefree and funny and she had made him laugh more than once. She had read his book and immediately understood why he wouldn't – couldn't – start a serious relationship with her. " I hope everything will be fixed between the two of you " she had told him with a strong Italian accent one evening, before kissing him on the cheek and leaving him standing alone in the doorway.

He had also written a lot – non that scandalous book he had intention to write when he had left. He had realized it was the _all_ the people – not just the ones from the Upper East Side – who were fake, and damaged and broken and made mistake. He had told Georgina he didn't need her help anymore, and she had just scoffed, saying he was too goody-goody to be remotely interesting. She had occasionally texted him to make him change his mind, but he hadn't answered.

Another thing he hadn't answered were Blair's e-mail. He had received – and he still kept receiving – at least five a day, all titled something like _You don't know the whole story_, _It's not what it looks like_ and _Please, at least read this_. He hadn't even bothered to open them.

Dan almost didn't realize the taxi stopped in front of the loft. He paid the taxi driver - who grunted again -, took his luggage from the bonnet and walked to the door.

He had almost expected to find her there – she still had the key, now that he thought of it – but of course she wasn't. Rufus wasn't there as well and Dan was surprised, but then remember he had some things he had to fix with Lily about the divorce. Both him and his dad had lived happier periods, and he couldn't wait to talk to him again in person.

He dropped the luggage on the floor, too tired to tidy everything up. He looked around, and his heart hurt when he realized that everything he saw reminded him of Blair. Then he realized why it was that way. Her stuff – clothes, make up, books, DVDs, even her Cabbage Patch – was still on the shelves, like it belonged there. Dan didn't whether to be mad or surprised Blair didn't even send Dorota to take everything back.

He looked at the door she entered so many times and remembered how much it annoyed him she never closed it behind her. He looked at the cookers, remembering that time she had insisted to make dinner and then burnt everything, so they had to order a pizza instead. He looked at the kitchen counter and remembered the time there was no one home so he took her right there, making her squeal when he had lifted her and laid her down the wooden surface. He looked at the couch where they had watched movies together, first as reluctant friends then as lovers and remembered all the times she had fallen asleep on his shoulder.

Gah, he really had to stop.

He had just decided to go make himself something to eat when he heard a knock at the door.

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**" The past is just a prologue. It all starts from here "**

**I'm quoting Gossip Girl just to say that I'll explain what happened in 5x24 in the next chapters :P**

**Reviews would be very much appreciated (:**


	2. Chapter 2: The deal

**Maybe the people who follow me on Tumblr already know my theory on what really happened on the episodes, but for the ones who don't...surprise, surprise!  
**

**I hope you'll like it (:  
**

**This is set after Dan/Blair loft scene.  
**

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**THREE MONTHS EARLIER…**

Blair sat on the couch and sighed.

She had just 'argued' with Dan, as if having all her secrets post on Gossip Girl hadn't been enough. She knew Dan didn't like giving ultimatums – he wasn't that kind of person – but she kind of understood while he had to be sure of her feelings towards him before leaving for Rome. A little smile crossed her face at the thought of them spending the summer in a beautiful foreign city without worrying about anything. It was true, she hadn't been very excited about leaving when he first asked her, but she really needed to escape from everything, especially after her diary blast. And who better than Dan Humphrey knew how to make her feel relaxed and carefree?

She would tell him she loved him that same night. She couldn't let him question her feelings for him. And then, she _did _mean it. She loved him. But saying those _three words_, _eight letters_ to someone for the first time was always frightening, especially after being trampled on so many times before. But Dan was worth it. And she couldn't wait to hear him saying it back to her again, to feel that warmth in her heart she hadn't felt for so long before meeting him.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she almost didn't hear her phone ring. She frowned when she didn't recognize the number.

Who could it be? Someone else accusing her for what she had written in her diary, for sure. Maybe an old minion she had mistreated in that diary? A restaurant complaining because she had ruined their reputation?

It was none of them.

" Hello? " she answered, tentatively.

There was so much noise in the background that Blair almost heard nothing. But how could she not recognize that voice?

" Blair, my dear " said Georgina, overcoming the noise. From what she could here, she assumed she was in a crowded place, probably a station or an airport.

" How did you get my number? "

" I have my ways " said Georgina shortly.

" What do you want? My day has already been bad enough until now, and I really don't want to hear you "

" There's no need to be so rude. I got you out of your marriage, didn't I? "

Blair nodded, then realized she could see her, so she muttered a yes that made Georgina smile.

" What do you want? " repeated Blair.

" It's time to payback " answered Georgina cheerfully.

" Payback? For what? "

" You owe me, Blair. When I got you out of your marriage with Louis, you said that if I had succeeded – which I have – you would have done what I asked you "

It was like something hit her in the stomach. It wasn't like her to be scared, but she couldn't believe that now that her life was finally heading in a good direction she owed something to Georgina Sparks. Blair was almost going to hung up the phone, but she couldn't shake the feeling she really owed her. If she hadn't done whatever she had done to get her out of her marriage she couldn't have started her relationship with Dan. She would have lost a year of her life in a palace that revealed itself to be a prison.

" I'm already out of my marriage " she answered, carefully " You can't pull me in again "

She heard Georgina laugh on the other side of the phone " Blair, Blair, Blair. I can do much, _much_ worse than that "

" And how would you do that? What kind of power do you have? "

" As I told you a little time ago, being Gossip Girl for two months helped me discover secrets even _I_ didn't want to know. I know everything about everyone "

Blair thought about it for a second, the decided to ask what she had to do " So, what do I have to do to repay you? "

Georgina kept silent for a few seconds as well, probably to enjoy the moment, then answered shortly " Get back together with Chuck for the summer "

It was Blair's turn to laugh " What? "

" You heard me " said Georgina, impatiently " Get. Back. Together. With. Chuck. For. The. Summer " she articulated the words as if she was talking to a particularly unintelligent kid.

" And how would _this_ help you in any ways? " she asked, skeptical and slightly amused.

" Oh, it wouldn't help _me_ directly " she said, sounding almost indifferent " But you would help someone who would then repay me "

" Who would want me to get back with Chuck? " asked Blair, confused as ever.

" Can't say " said Georgina cheerfully " But this person really needs your help to get back something that was his once " she added, cryptically.

" Tell me who it is I'm helping " answered Blair, forcefully " _If_ I decide to do this, of course "

" Why don't you guess? It's gonna be way more fun "

" Georgina… " Blair threatened.

" Fine! " she said with fake annoyance " The person who needs your help is… " she enjoyed the suspense again " …Bart Bass "

Blair kept silent for a few seconds, a hundred question crossing her brain. Then she frowned, indignant " Don't tell me Chuck was the one who told his father that I had to repay you in this way! "

Georgina sounded annoyed and scoffed " I remembered you smarter. Chuck doesn't know about this, and there's no need for him to "

Blair's frown became sharper " Then why…? "

" _Because _" answered Georgina, using the same condescending tone as before " If Chuck is all hung up on you he will leave the Empire aside, and Bart could do what he wants with it "

" It's awful! "

" It's business " replayed Georgina shrugging.

" I'm not getting back together with Chuck to help Bart with his – " she interrupted herself when a thought suddenly crossed her mind " If you made this deal with Bart all those months ago, then you knew he was alive and you didn't tell anyone "

Blair could imagine Georgina shrugging again " What's the big deal? He asked me to keep this secret and I did "

Blair stood silent and stared at the board in front of her without really seeing it. She started to speak again just when another thought occurred in her mind " You said we should _supposedly_ " she stressed the word " get back together just until the end of the summer. Why is that? "

" Do I have to explain you _everything_? " asked Georgina, annoyed " Bart needs to keep Chuck, well… _busy _until he gets to sign an important contract at the beginning of September that would make the Empire his and his only "

" It's awful " muttered Blair again.

" It's business " repeated Georgina with the same tone as before.

" I'm not doing this " said Blair, decisive " I have no intention to screw up Chuck's Empire._ And_ " she added, louder to underline that word " I'm perfectly happy with Dan, thank you very much "

" And thanks to whom? " asked Georgina, pretending she didn't really know " Oh, yeah, to me, since I got you out of that marriage "

Blair remained silent.

" One of the reason I love screwing over people so much is that I can manipulate them. I _know _you, Blair, and I know you won't feel at ease with yourself until you repay me "

Blair had to admit Georgina was right. She hated owing people, but she always paid her debts. On the other hand, accepting this deal would mean spending the summer without Dan but with her ex-boyfriend instead. Since the incident, she decided she didn't want to be involved in Chuck's life anymore – or at least no more than necessary. She had helped him find the truth about Jack only because she knew what it was like to have issues with her parents, but that was it.

" Are you still there, Blair? "

" Yes " she answered shortly, trying to make up her mind.

" I just want to remind you that you have no choice. You owe me. And if you decided not to respect our deal… well, remember that I have a lot of power right now "

Blair almost laughed in frustration " My secret diaries are already out, Georgina. I don't have anything to hide anymore "

" Oh, but what was talking about you? " asked Georgina, sweetly " I was talking about Dan "

She swallowed the lump in the throat she instantly felt when she heard those words " What about Dan? "

" Wouldn't it be a pity if no editor wanted any of his books anymore? "

Blair's grip on the phone tightened " You can't do this "

" Of course I can. But if you accept our deal, I won't do anything bad. Well, anything _too_ bad. Just remember no one needs to know about this "

She took a deep breath and tried to calm down. She never regretted her upcoming words. Dan was most important than everything.

" So… just for the summer? "

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**I'd love to hear your thoughts.**

**Really. **

**Review.**

**For Dair's sake.**

**PS. Wish me luck, I have an italian test tomorrow and I haven't even started study :P**

**FIC UPDATED EVERY MONDAY.  
**


	3. Chapter 3: On the roof of the Empire

**Hey, everyone (:**

**I'm already telling you that this chapter and the next will focus on the scenes of the actual episode, but with Blair's POV. I'm sorry about this torture, but it was necessary :P**

**Forvive my (hopefully not so many) grammar mistakes (:**

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It was just that afternoon that she had decided to accept the deal with Georgina. Did she have another choice, anyway? She couldn't bear the thought of Dan never getting published because of her.

But she wasn't going to keep the secret just as she had promised Georgina. She was going to help Chuck have his Empire back – maybe just a part of it - and she was going to tell Dan the truth, in a way or another. He deserved to know why she had turn her back at him. Maybe she couldn't tell him in person, but she would find a way, and he would understand. She was sure.

Now the real problem was convincing everyone she was still in love with Chuck. She had made pretty clear to everyone in the last months that her ex didn't have her heart anymore. But she couldn't fail.

She practiced her speech in front of the mirror while getting ready to go out, just like a student before an exam. And that was an exam she absolutely needed to pass. She told herself that everything would be fine – she was a born liar, after all. But the thought of talking about Chuck again, and saying something positive about him made her stomach tighten. She had to do it, though. For her. For Dan. For their future together.

Blair took a deep breath and went out of the bathroom. Her mother smiled at her fondly and said " I can't believe how much more grown up you are at your age than I was. I suppose it's the divorced. And all the other mistakes you've already made " she added.

" Well, it won't get easier any time soon " said Blair, sighing convincingly " I'm headed for a decision. Dan versus Chuck "

Eleanor seemed to think for a second " You always did love Jane Austen "

" As literature, not my life! " she sighed again, exaggeratedly and headed towards the mirror. She remembered when she had to pick between Chuck and Louis and Dan suggested her to make a list of pros and cons " Dan is my best friend and when we're together is great. I feel strong and safe " she couldn't help the warmth she felt every time she talked about him and the little smiled that crossed her face before adding " Except in his neighborhood "

She heard her mother laugh a bit and she promised herself she would be very convincing while talking about Chuck. Eleanor maybe wasn't the mother of the year, but she did care for her and she had to prove Chuck was 'the better option'.

" And with Chuck? "

_Here we go_, thought Blair. _Be convincing_.

" I'm vulnerable " she said, and she felt ridiculous for even saying it out loud " He has devastated me… " she went on, and she struggled to find some redeeming quality about her relationship with him. But she couldn't help but think of Dan when she added " He's also made me happier than I've ever been "

She looked at her mother in the mirror and hastened to say " I just don't know which kind of love is better ". She felt ridiculous again after those words. The answer was so clear that she asked herself why she hadn't seen it years ago. Or maybe there wasn't even a question to begin with.

She turned around to face Eleanor " You probably think I'm pathetic for even caring " she added, revealing her true thoughts " If I was truly powerful I'd be content without any man at all " She remember Dan's words when he said that no _man_ or magazine should be able to make her feel weak and she almost sighed again.

" Everyone has a heart, my dear " said her mother wisely "Trust me, Blair, there isn't a woman out there more powerful than you are "

"You really think so? " she asked, touched.

" Yes, I do, that's why I want _you _to take over my company "

Blair's eyes widened in surprise. She was flattered, of course. She knew her mother loved her job and she evidently had to trust her very much to pass the reins to her. But Blair knew she wasn't a designer.

" That's what I've been trying to talk to you about " said Eleanor, excited " I have decided to retire, and I know you've always said you didn't want any part of what I do – "

" Have you seen my closet? " she asked, interrupting her, and her mother nodded. " Fashion is art and culture and history and everything I love combined " she remember she had told Dan something similar the year before, while they were walking down the street drinking coffee " But I'm not a designer "She was an _evil dictator of taste_.

" So your first order of business will be to find the right ones to take over. So what do you say? Will a real Waldorf woman carry on the name? " asked Eleanor, smiling.

Blair nodded. Maybe it wasn't what she had always hoped for, but it was a great opportunity to work in a fashion business. She couldn't wait to tell Dan. Along with all the rest. " Yes! Of course yes! " she smiled and hugged her mother.

Penelope's arrive interrupted the conversation and Blair went to the bathroom to change and escape from the back door. She smiled, knowing she had convinced her mother she still loved Chuck even after everything he'd done. She was thankful that Eleanor didn't know her as much as Dorota did. Lying to her would have been _impossible_.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The cold air of the night hit her in the face and the knot in her stomach tightened at the thought of what she was about to do.

Chuck was on the roof of the Empire – the hotel he traded her for -, not looking at her, so she could take a deep breath and got prepared to lying at his face. Bart had just taken over the company, but Blair knew his position wouldn't have been stable until he signed that contract in September.

She thought of Dan waiting for her and her heart skipped a beat knowing he would think she was with Chuck. And he would have been right. But of course he didn't know the whole story, and Blair hadn't even had time to call him – she had just sent a quick e-mail explaining everything and hoped he would read it before leaving the loft.

Blair walked towards Chuck and he turned around to face her.

" I'm sorry " were the first words she said, sighing convincingly.

" I don't need your pity " he answered, sharp.

" I'm not here because I pity you " she said, and she wondered why her voice sounded so baby-like. Then she realized it had always been like this with him. She never felt strong, or powerful. Just a scared little baby. She took a little breath and went on " I'm here because it's time to be honest with you "

_If only I could be really honest,_ she thought.

Chuck just looked at her, without changing expression.

" I love you "

He just stared at her.

" I'm _in love_ with you " She had never realized how much easier was to say those three words to someone without really meaning it than to someone who meant the world to you. The way they came out of her mouth – weak, meaningless, sort of pleading – almost disgusted her.

" I have tried to kill it " she went on, looking down and hating every word she was saying " … to run away from it, but I can't and I don't want to anymore "

" So what? "

Why didn't he show any reactions? This was supposed to be the easy part of the deal!

" So now we can be together " she hastened to say, hoping he would agree with her " Is it not what you want? "

Her voice sounded so weak again. She couldn't believe how much she hated it.

" It was " answered Chuck, and Blair's heart almost stopped. What if he didn't want her anymore? What about the deal? What about Dan? " Before I lost everything "

Her emotions changed in a heartbeat. She went from scared to almost angry at his constant complaining and she couldn't help that little scoff that escaped her mouth " Bass Industries isn't everything! I'm gonna take over my mother's company and – " she stopped, seeing he was already upset about her idea " – It can be our future "

" The only reason the Waldorf Design has a future is because I gave my money for it " answered Chuck with his usual tone, and Blair was really tempted to literally turn on her heels and leave. " My father was right " he went on, almost disgusted " I _always_ put you first "

It took her Blair all the control she could muster not to scream at him that that was the biggest lie he had ever told. She had never been enough for Chuck, and now he even had the guts to tell her he had always thought about her first? Was he thinking about her that time he had traded her for the same hotel they were on right now?

" You bet against me every time " he kept going, every word making her anger grow stronger and stronger. She even closed her eyes, as if she couldn't hear him that way " Now I have nothing "

" You have me " she told him, repeating the words Dan had told her months ago and remembering how good it had felt knowing that there would be someone always there for her no matter what.

Chuck shook his head and answered " It's not enough "

No, that was enough. _She_ had enough.

She was going to walk away when he started speaking again " I need a future "

" The let me be part of it " she almost pleaded.

" I don't wanna be Mister _Blair Waldorf_ " he said with disgust and Blair wondered why she had spent years and years of her life chasing this man. If it was a man they were talking about " I'm Chuck Bass " he added as an excuse.

He walked away without looking at her again, and Blair fought the urge to cry. She needed Dan, she wanted Dan. Only him could make her feel better right now.

But to have Dan – and to save his career – she needed to be with Chuck first.

She stared at the floor without really seeing it and decided not to hold back the tears anymore.

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**I'd love to hear what you think (:**

**Review. **

**Pretty please.**


	4. Chapter 4: In Monte Carlo

**Hello there (:**

**As I previously said, this chapter will focus on Blair's thoughts during the episode, but I promise next chapter will be more interesting (:**

**An enormous thank you at all the people who reviewed - you guys make my day! **

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Blair couldn't even enjoy Paris, and that was saying something about how she was feeling. She had always thought that the city looked better at night, but at the moment everything seemed somehow off, dull and sad.

She had tried to call Dan at least five times a day since her meeting with Chuck on the roof of the Empire, but he had never picked up. He hadn't answered her e-mails – and since she had put them on the advice reading, she knew he hadn't even opened them. And of course he hadn't bothered answering her texts.

Blair had wanted to go see him the day after she had 'chosen' Chuck but he was already gone. She had opened the door with the key he had given her just a few weeks before and found the loft empty, except for her stuff still on the shelves. She had picked her Cabbage Patch – who was on the ground of the living room – and put it on the shelf next to Cedric. Blair could have sent Dorota to pick everything up, but she preferred it to stay that way – her things still on the shelves made her feel like she could live there with Dan again.

She couldn't help but imagine how things would have gone if she hadn't had to make the deal with Georgina. Possible scenarios flashed into her mind at the speed of light; Dan and her on a plane to Rome, she holding his hand at the departure. Them making love in the plane's bathroom – they hadn't been able to keep their hands off each other since that day in the elevator. Them watching a movie and she falling asleep on his shoulder. Her dragging him along through the whole city. Him taking pictures of her. Going to the beach. Eating Italian food and drink red wine until they were both tipsy. Him teaching her Italian. Falling asleep every night in each other's arms.

She looked out of the car window and sighed again.

" That is your third sigh since the 7° arrondissement " pointed out Eleanor, putting her lipstick on " You're having regrets about leaving? Or speaking to Serena? "

Blair appreciated that her mother was concerned, but she almost preferred when she didn't have a clue about what was going on in her daughter's life " Not at all " she answered instead and forcing a smile on her face " Those are 'I love Paris' eyes. I can't wait to start discussing heels heights and clothing "

" Good " Eleanor smiled at her for a moment, but then turned serious " Just be sure that you're ready for this " she stood silent for a second, then asked " You don't have any sense of someone pulling you back home?

Blair couldn't keep a straight face. She couldn't believe her mother was so good at reading her inside just when she had decided to lie.

" Nothing's holding me back anymore " she answered instead with a light tone. She thought of saving Dan's career when she said " I know what I want. And I'm gonna get it "

She looked out of the window again and let her thoughts wonder on how she could get Chuck back to make the deal work.

oOoOoOoOoOo

Blair had a few drinks before going into the Casino. She absolutely had to calm her nerves and make the plan work. She had never been more anxious – maybe except at her wedding.

She took a deep breath and walked into the room, her eyes gazing on all the people to find Chuck. She spotted him sitting on a table, so she closed her eyes for a second to get ready and then walked to him.

" Sir, is that seat available? " she asked, and she could see Chuck's surprise when he heard her voice.

" Yeah, take mine "

_Blair 1, Chuck 0_, she thought as she took place next to him " Thanks for the call "

She could feel Chuck's eyes on her, so she turned around to face him and tried to smile, but her face didn't seem to cooperate. Her heart was beating fast, but not in a good way, and she felt a lump in her throat because of her nervousness.

" You fought for me all year " she began, with that trembling baby-voice she had started to hate " I've come to fight for you "

To another person, Chuck's face could have seemed blank, but she knew better. He was intrigued. He liked – loved – the thought of her fighting for him, the idea of being worth fighting for. It was like every other time. Him screwing up and her begging him to take her back, fighting for his love. No wonder he didn't look all that surprised of her change of heart on the roof of the Empire – she always followed him like a puppy.

" Will you be joining the game? " asked one of the man in white smoking of the Casino.

" You said I always bet against you " she told him while looking at him " But this time I'm all in "

When he looked at her after her words, Blair knew she had made it. Chuck's heart was hers again and, for the first time ever, she didn't want it. She managed a smile, though, that faded knowing what would happen after that game.

Chuck had taken her back and he was surely going to expect something from her that night.

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**Reviews are always welcome (:**


	5. Chapter 5: Blair's summer

**Haloa, people who still follow my story!**

**There's nothing much to say, I just want to thank you _very, very, very_ much for reading (:**

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The magazine was just in front of her eyes, but Blair was just pretending to read. She was near the pool of a five stars hotel in Cote d'Azur, laying on a deckchair and trying not to scream in frustration.

She had to leave her mother in Paris to follow Chuck, so she couldn't even help her with her company. She had tried to bring some papers with her in Cote d'Azur, but as far away as she was from the France's capital she couldn't do much.

She had also tried to help Chuck take his Empire back. She thought that what Bart was doing was really unfair, and she had promised herself she would go anything in her power to help her ex. The only problem was that Chuck didn't really inform her on what he was doing and every time she had tried to ask about his work he had glared at her and told her he was busy. She had managed to sneak out in his office once, and she had taken as much papers as she could to study them by herself. She had realized what he really needed was a new investor and she had made a few calls in secret to help him with his cause, but no one seemed to want to stipulate a deal with him. Since she and Chuck had moved there for a few weeks after she had followed him in Monte Carlo, Chuck had spent every day working, trying to get the Empire back and not considering her very much. On one hand, Blair was glad of that – at least she didn't have to pretend to be the girlfriend madly in love – on the other she felt closed in a box, because he didn't allow her to go anywhere and do what she wanted since he _needed her support so badly_.

They only time he had decided to spend some time with her was a few weeks before, when he told her he wanted to re-build their relationship. He had made her breakfast – in the meaning he ordered the personal chef what to cook – and brought her coffee, thing that immediately reminded her of Dan. Breakfast was mainly composed by special, singular dishes. No waffles, no pancakes, no macaroons. He had asked her what she wanted to do, and she immediately took the opportunity to visit Nice. The first argument rose when Chuck absolutely wanted to rent a limo while Blair simply wanted to walk around to see the shops. After she had begged enough, he had agree to go on foot, but didn't talk to her for an hour after that. Blair realized that even if he wanted to talk, they had absolutely _nothing _to talk about, except maybe how _magnetic_ and _epic_ they were. She had insisted to visit the Chagall museum and instantly knew how much Dan would have liked it. They would have probably spent half an hour on every painting, bickering in that way they always did. Instead, she found herself reassuring Chuck the visit wouldn't take long and taking mental notes on everything to tell Dan when she got back.

After that disastrous day, their encounters pretty much happened just in the bedroom every night. She had tried to find some excuses – headache, tiredness – but she couldn't hide forever. Sex with Chuck made her feel dirty and not good at all. There weren't sweet words or deep kisses before, he usually just showed up in their room with this trousers already halfway off after a difficult day at work. It was rough and fast and never good enough for her, and every time she looked in the mirror the morning after she felt like a prostitute. But what could she do?

She was so lost in her thoughts she almost didn't hear the phone buzz. It was a text from Georgina.

_Bart is going to sign that contract two days from now. You're almost free. _

It was like a weight was lifted off her chest. Just two days. Just two days. She couldn't take this summer anymore and the thought that in a bit more than 48 hours she could hug Dan again made her heart quicken. But she sighed when she realized he still didn't know the whole story. He hadn't answer her calls, text or e-mails and he probably thought she had chosen Chuck for real. She really had to fix everything.

Suddenly, her phone rung and when she picked up Chuck's voice greeted her.

" Hey "

" Hey " she answered as well " How's work going? "

" Bad " he hissed, frustrated, like every time she tried to interfere with his job " But I didn't call you for this. A new investor is interested in my cause "

" That's great " commented Blair, surprised. Maybe one of those calls she had made had helped him somehow.

" He's in New York right now, and he doesn't want to negotiate with me over the phone. He's staying the City just for a few days, so… " he left the sentence suspended, waiting for her to understand the implications.

" So you have to go back to New York? "

" _We_ have to go back to New York " he answered.

" Why we? "

" Because " started Chuck, sounding almost pleading " You are my lucky charm I need to have you by my side to stipulate that contract "

" Chuck, that's really sweet " began Blair, not actually meaning it " But why don't you go ahead and I'll join you in a week or so? August is almost over and I could go back to Paris to help my mum with the comp – "

He didn't even let her finish " I _need_ you " he repeated " You know how much the Empire means to me "

" And you know how much my mother's company means to _me_ " replayed Blair, irritated. Of course, it had to be her who gave up everything to follow him.

" Blair, just come with me. I know you miss New York. You'll be able to see Nate and Serena – "

" I haven't talked to Serena all summer " she interrupted him. How typical of him. He didn't even bother to ask her why she hadn't spoken with her best friend.

" I need you " Chuck repeated for the third time.

Blair's mind was working quickly. If she broke up with Chuck and told him to go to New York, he could still be able to save his Empire. And Georgina wouldn't have the time to ruin Dan's career in a span of 48 hours. Right?

" Chuck, if you go, you might still be able to save the situation " said Blair at the end " I know you can do it. You don't need a lucky charm "

" I want you by my side. After I stipulate the contract we could finally start thinking seriously about our relationship " he seemed to really mean it, but Blair knew better. If the Empire became Chuck's again, he would have worked even harder on it.

" Chuck " began Blair taking a deep breath " I don't know if this is going to work "

" What? The contract? I can assure you that the investor really wants to – "

" No " she interrupted him again, getting ready for the next step she was gonna make " I was talking about our relationship "

" What are you talking about, _Blair_? " he hissed her name.

" I don't know if we could work… we never have, after all. You're so busy with your company and I will be so busy with mine that – "

" Are you trying to break up with me? " Chuck didn't let her finish " After_ begging_ me to give you another chance you repay me this way? "

" Don't put the blame on me! " she raised her voice " We just don't work out " Since Chuck said nothing, she went on " I know you can save your Empire and I just want the best for you. And the point is, _I_ am not the best for you, just like you are not the best for me "

" Who put these thoughts in your head, Blair? If it was Humphrey… "

" Leave Dan out of this " she said, serious.

" Then it _was_ him! "

" No, it was me " answered Blair " I've thought of this for a while "

" But that's not true! " Chuck fought back " We are _meant_ to be "

" Do you realize you're repeating the same things over and over? How perfect and magnetic we are? " asked Blair " But that's not true, Chuck. We could never work out as a couple "

" I'm doing my best, while you… " she could feel his anger through the phone.

" It is not_ your_ fault or _my _fault " explained Blair " It's both of us. We always bring out the worst in each other "

Chuck kept silent for a few seconds " I guess that's it, then "

" I just want the best for you " she repeated, and she meant it, but he didn't seem to care.

" Goodbye, Blair "

When Chuck hung up the phone, Blair felt finally free. And that was the best sensation she'd ever felt.

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**Well, I got everyone in character! Tell me if I didn't and what I can do to get better (:**

**PS. I saw the Chagall museum and I didn't really like it, but I think Dan and Blair, being the intellectual snobs they are, would enjoy it :P**

**Your reviews make my day... understand the implications XD**


	6. Chapter 6: September again

**Hi, everyone!**

**I hope you'll enjoy this chapter - and in case you don't, let me know how I can get better at writing XD**

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All summer she had been waiting for the moment she would knock on his door.

She didn't know what to expect, really. A part of her thought he would probably shut the door at her face, but the other part couldn't help but hope she'd be able to fix everything. She hoped she would be able to kiss him again, to taste his lips again, to run her fingers through his hair again. When she had left home she was pretty sure she'd manage to adjust all the mess she had inadvertently made. Then why was she in front of his door with her heart beating fast and a sense of nausea?

She had come back to New York just a few hours before – hours she had needed to gather enough courage… and to have a shower – after spending a week in Paris with her mother to run Waldorf Design. She hadn't heard from Chuck in weeks, but she had read on the newspaper he had managed to save his Empire and that his relationship with his dad wasn't going so well. Blair just wanted the best for him, but it was the time she decided she wanted the best for herself as well.

Blair took a deep breath and knocked on his door. She still had the key, but she decided to knock first, and to use it just in case he shut the door at her face.

Which was exactly what he did.

She just got a glimpse of him – his eyes full of surprise, his grey shirt (the one she had worn many times before), his messed up hair – before the door was the only thing she could see and a 'click' of the lock was the only things she could hear. She should have seen it coming, but that didn't keep her from feeling a lump in her throat at the thought he didn't even want to see her.

But she couldn't give up.

Blair took the key from her handbag and fondly remembered the time he gave it to her. The way he had said that his loft was hers as well in case she needed something and the way she had smiled at his words. When she put it in the lock and turned it, the door opened with a loud _creeeek_.

Dan was on the armchair – the same one he had been sitting on that night she had told him she was lost – and it kind of felt like a déjà-vu_._ But this time she wasn't scared or lost – she was sure of what she wanted, what she needed. It was _him_. It was always him.

Seeing him again after three months was overwhelming. It was like waves of emotions rushed over her, mixed with memories of him – the way he smiled, the way he smelled, the way he cheered her up, the way he made her laugh – and she knew she couldn't and she _wouldn't_ lose him.

She didn't know what to say – why hadn't she prepared a speech before going? – and she immediately regretted the first words that left her mouth " You got a haircut "

If he had looked blank before, he was now extremely confused " What do you want, Blair? "

" Why didn't you answer my calls? Why didn't you at least read my e-mails? " she asked instead.

He scoffed, getting up " Why? To listen to you telling me that you were really sorry? That you cared about me but that you and Chuck were _meant to be_? " he stressed his words " That you didn't want to hurt me? That you still wanted to be my friend? No, thanks "

His tone hurt her, but she knew he had every reason to be bitter " It's not what it looks like. You have to listen to me "

" Never thought I don't wanna listen? " he fought back, and she could see the anger and the hurt in his eyes " Never thought I might be sick of hearing you making excuses? You could have just told me you didn't love me, and we would have ended there. I would have listened to your explanation of what wasn't working in our relationship and maybe I would have understood. But I don't want to listen anymore. We are done here "

" Oh, no we aren't " Blair took a step closer, desperately wanting to make up. After all she had been through, she couldn't lose Dan " I can explain everything, and you have to believe me "

He shook his head " Why should I believe you? I don't even know who you are anymore, Blair "

" It's not about knowing each other, even if we do and that should be enough. It's about _trust_. I trust you, you trust me… remember? " she couldn't help but add.

A little involuntary smile crossed his face, and Blair hastened to go on " I didn't go back to Chuck that night because I loved him. I haven't loved him for a long time "

She could feel Dan was listening to her, so she continued " Remember who got me out of my marriage in advance instead of waiting for a year for the divorce? "

" Georgina " he answered, not understanding where she was going with that question.

Blair nodded " Georgina told me if she'd be able to get my out of my marriage with Louis, I had to do something to repay her. She… she asked me to get back together with Chuck for the summer " she stopped, thinking about how bad she had felt when she had accepted the deal.

Dan was still looking at her, confused but not as mad as before " Why would Georgina want you to get back with Chuck? "

" She owed Bart Bass. If I… _distracted_ Chuck long enough, he'd be able to take his Empire back. She told me that if I wouldn't do it " Blair looked at him " she'd make sure you'd never get published again. I couldn't bear the thought of you never getting published because of me "

Dan kept silent, assimilating her words " You did that for me? " he asked at the end " Why? "

" Because I love you "

It was the first time she ever told him, and maybe she kinda threw it at him instead of saying it romantically as she had originally planned, but she couldn't stand the thought of him not knowing anymore. He needed to know she loved him – she had for a while – and that she had spent her summer regretting not saying it sooner.

She saw his surprise on his face, but when he spoke again, he did it with a bitter tone " I kissed Serena "

Waves of cold washed over Blair. He had kissed Serena? Had he got over her that soon?

" It was the night you… 'picked' Chuck " he used quotation marks to make her understand he believed her " She told me you loved him and that you'd always run back to him. A guy spilled a drink over her dress, and she asked me to help her getting out of it "

Blair listened in growing anger and shock.

" She kissed me and I… I kissed her back. I… thought you were gone for good. I know that doesn't justify what I've done, and I'm really sorry. She… she wanted to go all the way, but I stopped her and left. She came here the day after to talk about it, but I sent her out and I hadn't heard from her since then "

Dan looked at her, his eyes full of regret, and he kept rambling " I'm so sorry, I really am, I should have never –

But she had taken a step closer and she was now two inches from his lips " Do you still love me, Dan? " she asked, whispering.

" I… Yes, yes, I still love you " he mumbled back.

" Then it's enough "

And when their lips touched, it was like kissing each other for the first time all over again. It was almost tentative and sweet at first, but it grew and hot and passionate as long as it went on. Even after kissing him for a million times, he still had the power to make her stomach flutter with excitement, to make her lips tingling, to make her knees go weak, to make her heart beat way faster than usual.

His tongue brushed her bottom lip begging for entrance and her lips parted a bit letting him, so he slid his tongue inside her mouth and found hers. They rolled over each other for a few moments before Blair's tongue pushed back into his mouth, taking her own objective to explore. He moved his arms around her waits to pull her close to him but she wanted more, so she pulled him even closer to her form so that there was no space between them. Blair run her fingers through his recently cut hair and her fingers brushed his neck, making him groan into her mouth. They parted for a second and looked at each other, then Dan brushed his finger to her cheek to wipe away her tears – she hadn't even realized she had been crying – and he smiled at her for the first time that evening.

Then she kissed him again, forcefully and held him even closer, as if she was afraid he was just a dream and he could disappear any moment. His cupped her face while kissing her, and she felt hear head spinning, like the time he had kissed her the exact same way, in the exact same place when she had told him her heart belonged to him. When they pulled away from the kiss and looked at each other this time, she knew he wanted her as much as she wanted him. He took her hand and guided to the bedroom and Blair realized she had been smiling and crying the whole time.

She found herself laying on the bed and undressed without really knowing how it happened and she moaned his name as he kissed her behind her ear. After that, everything became confused; if someone asked her about that night she would say she just remembers how they were a tangle of limbs in a matter of second, how she had kept moaning _I love you_, _I love you_ over and over every time the thrust into her, how she had come undone just a few seconds before him.

And she would also say she remembers how great it had felt when he had told her he loved her as well and that he always would.

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**I don't think Dan and Serena had sex. I re-watched the episode (ewww) and I noticed they were barely undressed in that scene, so...**

**Reviews would be lovely (:**


	7. Chapter 7: The morning after

**Haloa!**

**This is the last chapter of the fic, and I hope you'll like it. I thank so much everyone who reviewed, you made my day!**

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When Blair woke up, the morning after, she smiled before even opening her eyes. She breathed deeply and snuggled closer into the warm sheets thinking of what had happened the night before. She had made up with Dan. She had also made _out_, with Dan. She had told him she loved him and he had answered he loved her as well. And that he always would.

She finally opened her eyes, still with a smile on her face and rested her face on her elbow. Dan was sleeping peacefully next to her, hugging his pillow, still naked under the sheets. Blair had to force herself not to lift them up to look. She looked at his new hair, instead, and she decided she liked it. It was long enough to bury her fingers in it – like she did last night – but short enough not to look like a jungle. She traced his profile with her gaze before lingering on his arms and his hands, that were now intimately acquainted with every inch of her. She didn't think she'd ever tire of admiring the view.

She kept smiling as she started caressing his back and she felt him move after a few seconds. Dan opened his eyes, still sleepy but evidently happy.

" Good morning " he smiled at her.

" Good morning " she answered and gave him a little kiss on the lips.

" Slept well? "

" Slept? " Blair almost laughed " We stayed up all night! "

" I didn't hear you complaining " he raised an eyebrow, with a smile still on his lips.

" Who said I'm complaining? " this time she openly laughed and laid down into bed again.

Dan moved a little closer to her and she snuggled up against him so her head could rest on his chest. She inhaled deeply and said " I missed you "

" I missed you too " he answered, kissing her hair " You have no idea how much "

They had been silent for a few minutes, just savoring the fact the other one was right there in that bed, when Blair spoke again " You know what's funny? "

" What? "

" That the first time we made love in your bed was after being broken up for months, instead of when we were initially together " she pointed out " We were too afraid of making noise and disturb your dad and Lily. How are they, by the way? "

Dan sighed " They're signing the papers for the divorce. I almost can't believe it "

" Me either. If there was a couple I was sure that could make it, it was them "

" Well, now you can bet on us " said Dan, trying to lighten up the mood.

She shook her head " No more betting, please "

After a few seconds, she spoke again " I really wanted to go to Rome with you, you know? I spent all summer wondering how things would have gone if I hadn't accepted that deal with Georgina. I imagined us walking hand in hand, drinking red wine, discussing Italian literature… you speaking Italian to me in bed… " she added, smirking a bit.

" Let's see if we can do something about that… " Dal laughed as Blair sat down on the bed, smiling, then straddled him. Dan bit down on his lower lip, then he leaned in to give her a sweet kiss on her lips.

" _Ti amo_ " he murmured.

He moved to kiss her neck and collarbone, making her moan " _Sei bellissima_ "

She run her fingers through his hair as he went down and found her breast " Dan… " she moaned again.

" _Sei meravigliosa_ "

She couldn't believe how those words could be such a turn on. " I want you " she breathed against his ear, but before he could do anything, the door opened and Rufus' head popped up from the doorway.

Bair quickly pulled the blankets to cover herself and she sat down on the bad again, her cheeks warm.

Rufus closed his eyes, embarrassed as well " I'm sorry to interrupt. I didn't imagine you would be… " he stopped himself " Anyway, Dan, I just wanted to tell you I'm going at Lily's to sign the last divorce papers "

Blair noticed his bitter tone, and she felt sorry for him. She wished him and Lily could fix things like she and Dan had.

" If you want breakfast, I made waffles " said Rufus " Oh, and I'm glad you two figured things out " he added with a small smile before closing the door behind him.

Blair threw herself on the bed, her cheeks red " I didn't imagine your dad would still be here! Oh, no! " she covered her mouth with her hand " We must have disturbed him last night! I wasn't exactly _quiet_! "

Dan laughed " No, you weren't "

" I'll never be able to look at him in the eyes! " muttered Blair, embarrassed. Dan took her hand from her mouth and kissed it " Don't worry. You were able to look at him in the eyes after the day he and Lily caught us… _hem_… trying to be intimate and you wore that… _provocative_ lingerie under that raincoat "

" Thank you for reminding me, Humphrey "

oOoOoOoOoOo

Blair was lying in bed as Dan was showering when her mobile rung. She sighed, then stretched her arms until the bedside table to get it.

" Hello? "

" Blair, my dear " answered Georgina " How are you? "

" I'm perfectly fine, and I don't need you to ruin my day, so I'm going to hang up "

The girl on the other side of the phone just laughed " From what I can detect from your mood, you're back with Dan "

Blair wondered whether telling her the truth or not, so she answered " What if I was? "

" Oh, it's none of my business " shrugged Georgina.

" Exactly. I'm just glad this deal is done and the story is over "

" Yes. And everyone lived happily ever after… oh, wait, except Chuck, since you broke his heart " she added, deviously.

" And he has broken mine multiple times " retorted Blair " Wait a second " she added when a sudden thought crossed her mind " You said I owed you because your freed me from my wedding. But it was Chuck who actually paid the dowry "

" Exactly "

Blair's heart missed a beat.

" Then all of this was for nothing! I didn't owe you anything! "

" Wrong. Who made Chuck pay the dowry? Sure, he already wanted to pay because he felt guilty, but _I_ convinced him "

" How? "

" Telling him I could help him with his _boring_ family issues. I told him I could find out the truth about his dad "

" But you already knew Bart was alive, you didn't need to discover anything " Blair frowned.

" So? " Georgina shrugged again, and Blair shook her head even if she knew the other one couldn't see her.

" Well, we've spoken long enough " said Georgina after a few seconds of silence " and I have better things to do "

" Like ruining other people's life? "

" Also "

" Goodbye, Georgina. Once and for all " said Blair, hanging up the phone.

" Who was it? " asked Dan, entering the bedroom.

Blair smiled at him and got up " Georgina. She assured me the deal was over "

He smiled as well " Good. So we can officially start over "

And when he kissed her, it already felt like a new beginning.

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**The end.**

**I'd love your comments (:**

**Thank you again so much for reading!**


	8. Epilogue: Rufus and Lily

**I know, I know, I said the story would be over with last chapter. But I didn't feel happy with the fact I still hadn't solved Rufus and Lily's storyline. So here it is XD**

**Of course, the song refers to the first chapter of the story.**

**I'd really, really, _really_ appreciate your reviews.**

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_But you didn't have to cut me off_

_Make it like it never happened_

_And that we were nothing_

_I don't even need your love_

_But you treat me like a stranger_

_And that feels so rough_

" Could you please turn off the radio? " asked Rufus to the taxi-driver, who just rolled his eyes and pushed a button to make the car fell silent.

Was it possible that that song was _everywhere_? Rufus had been forced to listen to it all summer long in supermarkets, taxis, shops and on the radio. He really couldn't stand it anymore; it reminded him too much of what was going on with his life.

When he had closed the door of the loft a few minutes before, all he had felt was bitterness.

Sure, he was happy Dan and Blair had made up- he also had had to listen to them all night long and it was an experience he wouldn't like to repeat– but he couldn't understand how some twenty years old could fix their love problems and he hadn't been able to fix his.

He and Lily had barely spoken during the summer, if not to discuss the divorce arrangement, and even during those times they were never alone – Bart was always there, watching them, with that stupid and fake smile on his face. Rufus didn't understand why she had chosen Bass; she had never really loved him – heck, they had slept together the night before the wedding! How could her feelings for him disappear as soon as her 'dead' husband showed up? And even if she _did _feel something for Bart, how could she forgive him after he had pretended his own death for _years_?

The questions kept lingering his brain, along with the song's word during the whole trip to the Upper East Side. He knew this was it. In his hands had the last papers to sign, then he and Lily would officially be divorced and they would probably never speak again. _How did it happen?_ , he asked himself for the one hundredth time. They were perfectly happy one day and basically barely speaking the day after.

Rufus almost didn't realize the car had stopped; he paid the taxi-driver and got off the car, taking a deep breath. _This is it_, he repeated to himself. _This is it_.

He wasn't sure he could go all the way through with it.

He was still in love with her. He had spent twenty years of his life wanting to be with her and now he was supposed to give her up after a few months?

He tried to postpone his entrance by talking with Vanya for a few minutes – who didn't seem to have understood Rufus was about to leave for good – but then forced himself to take the elevator and knock at her door.

When she opened the door she was wearing glasses, sign that she had been reading. Evidently she wasn't upset by the divorce if she could concentrate on doing something other than regretting how things had gone.

" Hello, Rufus " she greeted him, as if nothing had happened – or at least, that's what it looked like to him.

" Hi, Lil. _Lily_ " he corrected himself after a second.

" Come in " she invited him and he entered the apartment, embarrassed. Things had never been this awkward between them.

" I have the divorce papers " he said " I'll just leave them here, tell me when you sign them " he added, leaving the documents on the kitchen counter and looking at her awkwardly.

Lily just nodded shortly and put her glasses on the counter as well.

" Oh, and… I brought you this " he handed her a blue scarf " I found it in a drawer at the loft "

" That's why I couldn't find it anywhere. Thank you " she took it from his hands and looked at him awkwardly as well.

" How… how are things going between you and Bart? " he couldn't help but ask. Gah, he was really a masochist.

" Things are fine " Lily answered quickly, too quickly, because he raised an eyebrow, questioning.

" Things are going _well_ " she said, more calm this time " So well that he's been in Europe for three weeks and I haven't missed him for a second "

" This isn't how a relationship should work, Lil " he tilted his head.

" Do you think I don't know? " she opened her arms, sighing " Do you think I don't know it's not normal not to miss your husband? But this is it. I'm fine without him. Home feels the same when he's not here… while without you… " she stopped for a second, her eyes watering.

Rufus walked closer to her, his heart pounding as if he was a teenager in love. Was it normal to feel this way at his age?

" I basically haven't been able to sleep properly since you haven't been next to me " she went on " And... home doesn't feel home if you're not there "

He saw a tear running down her cheek, so he wiped it away with his finger. She threw her arms around him and he hugged her tightly, his heart still beating fast.

" I'm so sorry, Rufus " she whispered between the tears " I'm so sorry "

" It's okay " he answered, knowing that she really meant it.

" I've never wanted to be like my mother " she said point blank.

" I know " he answered, even if he had no idea of what she was talking about.

" No, you don't " she pulled away from him and looked at him in the eyes " When my mother was alive, all I ever did was criticize her. But then she passed away and I… I think I found myself becoming like her more and more without even realizing it. Maybe it was my way to cope with her death, I don't know, but I'm so, so sorry about the way I acted. I should have never pushed you away for money. I shouldn't have pushed you away at all "

Rufus smiled and kissed her lovingly to make her understand everything was forgiven. She answered the kiss and he could feel her finally smile against his lips.

When they pulled apart, she hugged him again and rested her head on his chest.

" And now what, Rufus? " she asked.

" Now we burn those divorce papers " he answered, making her laugh for the first time after months.

Even if the situation was precarious, Lily knew they would be able to face all the obstacles together. They always had, after all.

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**I hope I got everyone in character!**

**Review.**

**For the children.**


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